April 2012
Kid I babysit: There's a monster under my bed!!
Me: That's silly, there's no such thing as mo...
Me: OH GOD IT'S TEARING MY ARM!
Me: Kidding. He only eats kids.
Me: Good night.
skinny people: eats everything loses weight
me: stares at almond gains 10lbs
most people: lol lazy sunday
me: lol lazy sunday, monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday and saturday
kaitnip:
why are girls expected to have perfectly hairless bodies while some men walk around looking like apes
When your friends make plans that involve money →
epic-humor:
Don’t be so serious. Laugh. Click here.
Teacher: ok everybody take out last night's homework
Me: oh shit did you do that?
Friend: no
Me: aw great me neither
Friend: yeah i just didn't have time, I had my music lesson and work for that other class to do and my electricity went off and my dog died and my mum had a baby and i was in a car crash and the kitchen went on fire
Me:
Me: my favourite fanfic got updated
That annoying piece of hair that never does what... →
wowfunniestposts:
this blog is epic
Me: Hey, I just met you
Me: And this is crazy
Me: But I've got Alzheimers
Me: Hey, I just met you
Reblog if you're thankful for your followers.
what happens when you wear merch at school
everyone: why do you want the horizon
everyone: who's bleeding on the dance floor?
everyone: why would a bride wer a black veil?
everyone: who's alexandria? are you asking her out?
everyone: why would you pierce a veil
everyone: devil wears prada? I LOVE ANNE HATHWAY
everyone: who's chelsea? why is she grinning?
everyone: why are you panicking at the disco? it's just a disco
everyone: why would you sleep with sirens
everyone: why are you motionless in white? are you racist against black
everyone: of mice and men? is that a book wat
everyone: why is suicide silence
everyone: i thought brides had white veils
everyone: is falling in reverse like jumping?
everyone: why are you escaping the fate?
everyone: why is your romance chemical?
everyone: paramore? you must mean paranoid hahah
everyone: tokio hotel? why are you promoting a hotel?
everyone: what's at an all time low
everyone: wtf is on your shirt
everyone: WHY DON'T YOU WEAR STUFF THAT MAKES SENSE